WHY EPICTETUS WOULD MAKE YOU TAKE A COLD SHOWER (AND NO, IT'S NOT ABOUT BIOHACKING)

Ever met someone who just doesn't crack under pressure? That's what Epictetus was all about. Born a slave. Died free. In between, he taught that your mind is the only thing nobody can touch. Everything else? Up for grabs. Weather, your surroundings, other people's opinions - all external. Your response? That's yours.

Hot water didn't exist in Epictetus's Rome. Cold showers were the only game in town. But choosing it on purpose, when you don't have to, that's the move. And he'd approve.

Cold showers are trending. Every podcast, every YouTube bro, every "optimize your life" newsletter is telling you to turn the handle to ice and stand there shivering.

Dopamine. Testosterone. Willpower. Biohacking.

That's the pitch.

And maybe some of that's true. I don't know. I'm not a scientist.

But here's what I do know: Epictetus got there first. And his reason was better.

WHAT EPICTETUS ACTUALLY SAID

Book 3, Chapter 12 of the Discourses.

Title? "On Training."

"I am inclined to pleasure; I will betake myself to the opposite side of the rolling ship, and that beyond measure, so as to train myself. I am inclined to avoid hard work; I will strain and exercise my sense-impressions to this end, so that my aversion from everything of this kind shall cease."

He's not prescribing cold showers. He's prescribing training.

The ship's rocking. You want the easy side? Go to the hard one. On purpose. Not because you have to. Because you want to own your own head.

Cold showers are just a way to practice. Same principle. Different water.

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BIOHACKING AND ASKĒSIS

Modern cold shower culture says: Do this because it's good for you. Benefits. Results. Optimization.

Epictetus says: Do this because it reminds you that comfort isn't necessary.

He called it askēsis. Training, practice, discipline. Not to get something. To become something.

Someone who doesn't flinch when life gets cold.

WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU STOP RUNNING FROM DISCOMFORT

Here's what I've noticed.

The first 30 seconds of a cold shower suck. No way around it. Your body screams. Your brain looks for escape.

But then something shifts.

You stop fighting. You just... stand there. Breathing. Letting the water hit. And you realize: I can do this. This isn't killing me. It's just uncomfortable.

And that realization? That's the whole point.

Because life is full of things you can't control. Weather. Traffic. Other people. Bad news.

But how you respond to discomfort? That's yours.

Epictetus again:

"Difficulties are the things that show what men are. For the future, on any difficulty, remember that God, like a trainer in the gymnasium, has matched you against a tough young opponent. For what end? That you may be a conqueror, like one in the Olympic Games: and it cannot be without toil."

Cold water is a pretty gentle trainer. But it's a start.

THE PRACTICE (NOT THE PROTOCOL)

Here's what it looks like for me.

No timer. No counting. No "science-backed 3-minute cold exposure."

Just: turn the handle cold. Get in. Stand there. Breathe. That's it.

Some days I last a minute. Some days five. Doesn't matter.

What matters is the reminder: I don't need comfort to be okay.

U.S. Marine Corps Lance Cpl. Erlyse Alcantaramendrano cold weather survival training exercise, Norway Photo by Cpl. Xavier Alicea, Feb. 7, 2026

Philosophers at the National Archaeological Museum, Athens Personal photo, Nov. 2024

WHAT THIS HAS TO DO WITH ANYTHING

Look, you don't need a cold shower. You don't need Stoicism. You don't need me telling you how to live.

But if you've ever felt like you're at the mercy of your moods? If a little discomfort throws your whole day off? If you catch yourself avoiding things because they feel hard?

This is the antidote.

Not biohacking. Not optimization. Just... practice.

You choose the cold. On purpose. And you learn that you're tougher than you think.

FINAL CALL

The water's cold. Your body complains. You stay anyway.

That's it. That's the whole thing.

No gadgets. No supplements. No $200 breathing app. Just you and the water and the quiet realization that you can handle more than you thought you could.

And Epictetus? He'd probably just nod and say: "Keep training."

Look, this site's called Cut & Kept for a reason. Rugged reviews. Refined routines. Stay Sharp.

The gear matters. The grooming matters. All of it. But none of it matters if you don't matter. A well-rounded man takes care of his tools and his skin. And his mind.

The gear needs maintenance. The body needs attention. The soul needs training. Cold showers are one way.

There are others. But the point is the same: You build the man. Everything else follows.